Of Relationships and Risk

Of Relationships and Risk

I recently stumbled on a quote by C.S. Lewis that reminded me why, despite all past pain, it's still worth the risk of being open to relationships.

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable."

While rejection and heartbreak are horrible, these results of trying to avoid such things altogether sound worse. And surely aren't part of the full, abundant life God desires us to lead.

When I Fall

When I Fall

by Rachael Lampa

How can I find you- are you hiding or am I
Should I go or should I wait- for a sign
Following your voice- walking through a desert night
Looking for a silent storm in the sky
And I stand in my emotion and I let it be my own
'cause I know I'm not forsaken
And I'll never be alone

When I fall - when I fall
I know Where I'll be landing
When I fall- when I fall
You will still be standing

Somewhere in the silence I can hear your broken voice
Like a radio station fading out of range
Somewhere in the crowd from the corner of my eye
I thought that I could feel you- walking by
And when I get this feeling like I am not so strong
I still can feel you with me
Yea you've been there all along

When I fall - when I fall
I know Where I'll be landing
When I fall- when I fall
You will still be standing
When I fall

Somewhere I'm alone- won't you take my empty hands
And fill them with your love
Won't you take me as I am

When I fall - when I fall
I know Where I'll be landing
When I fall- when I fall
You will still be standing
When I fall

Grieving, But Still Giving Thanks

I have to rest in the fact that God knows what He's doing.

The trap, is to try and figure out tragedy from an inherently limited, human point of view. It becomes a control issue if we can just figure out why this happened, then we'll be able to manage it.

Trusting God springs from buying into Bible truth, which makes clear that God is God and I am nothing. I have to release my tendency to want to protect myself through controlling everything I can possibly control, in favor of trusting God implicitly in all things.

Isaiah 55 says 'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts'.

The comparison between God's ways and mine, of His thoughts and mine, is the difference between heaven and earth. It's huge. And I either believe that God is good and He is in control, or I don't. That's not easy, but it's simple.

From Radical Gratitude by Ellen Vaughn

Life Together

It is not experience of life but experience of the Cross that makes one a worthy hearer of confessions. The most experienced psychologist or observer of human nature knows infinitely less of the human heart than the simplest Christian who lives beneath the Cross of Jesus. The greatest psychological insight, ability, and experience cannot grasp this one thing: what sin is. Worldly wisdom knows what distress and weakness and failure are, but it does not know the godlessness of men. And so it also does not know that man is destroyed only by his sin and can be healed only by forgiveness. Only the Christian knows this: In the presence of a psychiatrist I can only be a sick man; in the presence of a Christian brother, I can dare to be a sinner.


Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Life Together

I thank God for the joy of living free!

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja' vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.

Steven Wright

grace

What has happened to grace? Can you imagine all of us who call ourselves Christians, walking around this earth with our hearts set on the reality that we are able to give out grace to anyone we come into contact with?

Heaven and Hell by John Jakes

Thoughts on pain...

Heaven and Hell is the third book of the Civil War trilogy written by John Jakes. The story is about the friendship between two West Point cadets, George Hazard from the north and Orry Main from the south. It tells of their lives and of their families before, during, and after the war. The following passage was when George Hazard was on a ship returning to America after staying in Europe during a time after his wife was murdered. His friend Orry had been killed in the war and now he was trying to answer the following questions about his life.

Why was there so much pain? Where did it come from?

This was what came to him...

The pain comes from more than the facts of circumstance, or the deeds of others. It comes from within. From understanding what we've lost.
It comes from knowing how foolish we were --- vain, arrogant children --- when we thought ourselves happy.
It comes from knowing how fragile and doomed the old ways were, just when we thought them, and ourselves, secure.
The pain comes from knowing we have never been safe, and therefore will never be safe again. It comes from knowing we can never be so ingnornat again. It comes from knowing we can never be children again.

Losing innocence. Remembering heaven.
That was the essence of hell.

Are you sad?

I have favorite passages I read over and over again. This one is from Pastor Jim...

My comments are in blue, no pun intended!

Are you sad?

This past week I attended a memorial service for families that lost loved ones in the past year. The time began with great somberness as we took in how many families had lost someone they loved during the past few months. This sadness changed in a few minutes as a pastor stood and began to share with us. With full respect for the reason we had gathered together, he shared his gift of love in a way that had us embracing life and even laughing at some very old jokes. The mood lifted and when it came time for us to leave you could see a change in the faces of most of the people, including mine.

What is sadness? Why does it penetrate so deeply? How can sadness be changed to joy or at least acceptance that allows one to move on? These thoughts have been pondering my mind since this experience, asking God to use this in some way to minister to you. That prayer continues as I release this article into writing.

Sadness is a mood that comes out of loss. Someone (or something) we dearly cherish is no longer available in our lives. It is one of those rare moments in life when we are face-to-face with reality and unable to ignore it.

I have several memories that bring on the mood of sadness. Loss of a childhood friend, my first dog Ernie, divorce and past behavior.

It is not a helpless time, or ought to not be. I believe that moods are mostly about choices. We can choose to be sad and we can choose to be happy - under the same circumstances. A verse that I find myself coming back to over and over again is found in Philippians 4:11-12 where Paul says that whatever circumstance he finds himself he has "learned" to be content. It does not come naturally but is a developed way of responding to the circumstances of life.

Phillippians 4:11-12 is one of my favorite verses. I pray daily about making choices, my attitude, casting aside my anxiety and fears, and how I respond to life.

The first action to take when you feel sad is to honor the sadness. To ignore or minimize it is an act of foolishness. The way to the other side of sadness is through it. The great news is that you are able to recognize sadness. The fact that you are recognizing it allows you to have choice. Honoring the sadness does not mean to allow it to consume you or to wallow in it like a hog. It means to admit that you are sad and honor the source of the sadness.

It wasn't until many years after the death of Ernie that I realized how much anger and sorrow I still had within me until I "honored the sadness."

Now you are in a moment of choice. You may "feel" like feeding the sadness or throwing a pity party. This is an example of how feelings can be misleading and actually cause us to linger longer in sadness than necessary.

In the moment of choice you can admit and honor the sadness and then open yourself to ways to think and move that do not feed the feeling. Frankly there are many times that one may want to stay in sadness. There may be good reason to spend a time in sadness if it is from grieving. However, there will become a moment of choice and it takes courage to embrace that choice and move out of sadness.

Moods continue if they are fed, and this is certainly true of sadness. When you know it is time to move out of sadness, develop a new diet for your spirit. A new diet is thinking thoughts that pulls you toward a healthy future. Allow me to provide an example: Sadness may be saying that no one likes me and there is no future for me. That is a lie and it takes a forceful, continuous action to move away from that thought. It can begin by stating a hope and then a reality as it begins to show up in your life.

For me, it is a feeling of being alone. A feeling of being disconnected. Like The Matrix, do you ever feel like you are dreaming or in a dream-like world where you do not know if you are asleep or awake?

I have been saddened for many years by my poor financial circumstance. I have plenty of evidence that it is true, but it was not something that I wanted to neither feed nor remain in this condition. I began to make statements of belief to move me in another direction. At least twice a day I would pray "I am the Head and not the Tail, the Lender and not the Borrower, Above only and not Beneath." This is from Deuteronomy 28:44 in a promise that God gave to the children of Israel. I began praying this prayer BEFORE it began to show up in my life. It did not immediately remove the debt or financial difficulties. BUT it was amazing how quickly my life began to change with debt after debt being paid in full. There were even new debts that surfaced and these too were paid in full. They were paid not by any lottery winnings or inheritance but my own earnings. My income has increased over 400% in the past year alone and has every indication of doubling this next year. I am not setting a measurement to see if my bank account overflows. What I am doing is claiming God's promise and believing that He will provide. He loves this arrangement and is proving over and over that He is more than a cute deity to pray to. He is real."

Amen! My situation, though similar, is different in that my work have been a tribulation in many ways. I do pray for coworkers and those in authority that they may feel the presence of God in their lives and that His will be done.

I do not have any magic words to instantly remove sadness from your life. I doubt that God would want to do so as there are many valuable lessons to be learned during sadness. What I have to share is like one beggar sharing with another beggar where to find food.

I do! Pray and thank God for all His blessings!

Move beyond sadness and its imprisoning power. You have choice and God gives you the place in His power and promises to move you beyond sadness to joys. I really believe He has much joy in store for you.

To your joy!

Pastor Jim

Wikipedia The Free Encyclopedia

If you are looking for information, such as what was happening the year you were born http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1955 (just substitute for your year) or the day you were born http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/April_16 (again, change the month/day) then check out Wikipedia.

Mother's Day 2006

Proverbs 31:26-31 (NIV)

26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 29 "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 31 Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

On this day let us Praise God for all women. Let us remember the women in our lives who share their wisdom, show their kindness, and who seek above all to honor the Lord.

Memorable Quotes...

What two people were talking in what movie? (2005)

I gave up alcohol about ten years ago.

Didn't like yourself when you were drinking, huh?

Hell, I loved myself when I was drinking. It was the other people that had the problem!

A Time to Dream

A Time to Dream by Idelette McVicker

When last have you taken time to dream? When last have you consciously allowed your thoughts to go places you won't normally venture? What if, today, you allowed yourself to go into every nook and cranny of your ideal self, your ideal life, your ideal world? What would that even look like? What would it feel like?

Today, let's move into those dreams that come into your consciousness and stir up your desire for a better self and a better world.

1. Getting started: Take a pen, some paper and start writing. Don't think about it too much. Allow yourself the freedom to write and dream without editing. (If you have to, you can edit later!) Dream about the following:

Three places I'd love to go (eg. the little coffee shop I always pass by, Japan, the moon)

Three things I'd love to do (eg. learn to sign, learn to salsa, sponsor a child)

Three things I'd love to accomplish (eg. start my own business, write a book, start a blog, produce a play)

Three skills I'd like to acquire (eg. salsa dancing, web design, flyfishing, painting with oils)

Ten things I'd really love to have (a car, a house, an iPod, etc.)

Three relationships I'd love to nurture (with my grandmother, my father, God)

If you are having trouble with this exercise, imagine you had only six healthy months left to live and make a difference. Then go through the questions again.

2. Now, think about the following and write whatever comes to mind as you read the words. Give yourself two to three minutes on each item:

My ideal self

My ideal body

My ideal home

My ideal work

My ideal relationship

My ideal life

My ideal day

My ideal world

3. Perhaps another way to think about these questions are:

What I hope for myself is ...?

What I hope for my family is ...?

What I hope for my world is ...?

4. Write a dream list. Write a list with every dream you have, everything you would like as part of your life. It's your list. Keep it safe and look at it often.

5. Now focus in: This year, if I could do only one thing, what would I like to accomplish? Write it down.

6. Pray. Laurie Beth Jones, best-selling author of The Path says, "Prayer has been called the most powerful source of energy known to man ... Prayers opens us up to receiving the divine help which surrounds and envelops us on a constant basis." In Matthew 21:22 we are encouraged to pray because, "You will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."

Now take some time to bring your dreams and your most intimate hopes to The Dreamgiver, the One who desires for you to live your absolute best life.

Sample prayer:
Dear God, today I bring you my life, my hopes, my dreams, my deepest yearnings. . . You know me intimately. You knew me even before I was formed in the womb. You called me into this world to do good and live the life I was uniquely and specifically created for. I ask for Courage and Wisdom to life this life--the life of my dreams. Show me where to start and help me be open to hearing your Voice today. I ask for a greater consciousness of your Presence, today and every day of my life. Amen.

A Blessing for Dreamers:

May your Dreams take you to the places of your truest self. May your Dreams give you insight into who you really are and what you can accomplish. May your Dreams remind you that you are powerful, necessary and unique. Remember, only you can bring the Beauty of your Authentic Life to this world. May you know Courage, Focus and Determination as you follow your Dreams.

I'm usually an emotional wreck

I'm usually an emotional wreck, so I was really excited when I heard about a new website called pandora.com. Read on (excepts without permission) from Media Matters @ Mennonite Media
InternetPosted: 5/5/2006 Pandora Website by Matthew Kauffman Smith

Pandora.com, a streaming Internet radio station (available on broadband connections only), houses many diverse musical combinations...In 2005, Pandora emerged as the product of five years of brainstorming and planning by the Music Genome Project, a group of musicians and computer-savvy music fans. The Project broke down songs into genetic matter. "Taken together," the Web site explains, "these genes capture the unique and magical musical identity of a song – everything from melody, harmony and rhythm, to instrumentation, orchestration, arrangement, lyrics, and of course the rich world of singing and vocal harmony."

Pandora's premise is simple: type in the name of a musician or song and see where it leads. Based on the selection, the Web site then builds a play list of songs and artists that contain similar characteristics. The song selection is based on the qualities of the individual song and does not take into account how record stores and radio stations would label the music. The result is a venture into an infinitely enlightening musical universe.

So cool!

myth # 1. "I'll never be free from my past."

Oh, wow...sometimes things just fall apart.












myth # 1. "I'll never be free from my past."

from TNIV eDevotional

at issue: forgiveness

"So if the son sets you free, you will be free indeed!"
John 8:36

This TNIV eDevotional is from: True Identity: The Bible for Women
and Strive:The Bible for Men by Zondervan

I feel as if I've lived two or three different lives. And if any one of those past lives ever catches up with me, then everything I can safely call my own today is gone-my reputation as a leader at work, a successful marriage, my loving family. My past threatens all of it. I fear someone, somewhere will claim to know what I'm "really like." Only I'm not that person anymore. Not perfect, but, thank God, not what I used to be. I truly believe I've changed and am growing into the person Christ wants me to be. But that person still carries a secret burden. As bright as the future is, I'm never free from the past.

I'm never free from the haunting accusations surrounding yesterday's mistakes that may ambush me today. Imaginary scenarios and entire conversations play out in my head. They sneak into my thoughts with crafty subtlety. Sometimes when I tuck my baby girl under the covers for the night and she whispers, "I love you," I want so much to enjoy the moment and soak in her affection. But a faint, persistent voice inside tells me, "You don't deserve her, you know. Not after what you've done.

And when I meet someone that I genuinely like, whose friendship I really enjoy, the thought inevitably traipses through my head that if they knew my past, they wouldn't think so highly of me. When my boss recognizes my "innovative leadership," I receive a sense of accomplishment. Until I begin to remember all my failures. It sounds hypocritical to say I believe Jesus has forgiven my past. I do believe. I just want to know, will I ever be free from it?

Sometimes it takes time to forgive ourselves for our past. About 80 percent of adults ages 45+ said they knew that God forgave them for their sins and that this knowledge gave them the strength to face their faults and be a better person, compared to 69 percent of those ages 18-44
-University of Michigan, Institute for Social Research

Thank you Lord for forgiving me of my sins!